God likes jewelry too...

It is amazing the lessons that are lurking for us in the most unlikely places...like my jewelry box. Who would have ever thought that God would use jewelry to teach me a lesson?

If you know me at all you know that I am NOT a "jewelry" girl. I have my wedding ring, that my wonderful husband spent way too much money on and ensured that on our 10th, 15th or even 25th wedding anniversary he would not be shelling out several more thousands of dollars for an "upgrade." That I wear constantly, I never take it off (except for when I was pregnant and my fingers were so swollen I was afraid that if I didn't take it off they would have to cut it off - my finger, not the ring, they would never be allowed to touch my ring). I have a few modest yet beautiful "real" pieces that Wade has purchased for me over the years, a few "quality" costume jewelry from my late grandmother and the rest of my jewelry consists of the baubles you see in such high class stores as Target or if you want to really get fancy, New York and Co.

Most of the time I don't wear jewelry, if I do happen to have time to think before leaving the house and remember to check my jewelry box, I usually end up wearing whatever tarnished, chipped, missing-a-rhinestone-or-two jewelry I manage to snag before rushing out the door. Usually I don't care, chances are people won't notice the "silver" has rubbed off or that missing faux crystal from my earring. If they do then they either have too much time on their hands or they are standing too close, in which case I don't care about their opinion of my jewelry.

Why don't you grab your real jewelry on your way out instead of the fake stuff you ask? Well, that is because I keep my "real" jewelry in a separate much more difficult to get to spot than in my jewelry box. On the off chance that someone breaks in and steals my jewelry box I don't want to lose what is most precious to me, what I can't replace. (there is a whole other lesson in this fact alone, but I'll get to that in another post.) So because my "real" stuff is hidden away, out of site and a bit difficult to get to, and because I don't care that much about what jewelry I wear anyway, I don't usually have the time to get my good stuff, but truthfully it is more because I don't think about it, you know the saying - out of site, out of mind.

Well the other day I was getting ready for a pretty snertzy event, I had a beautiful outfit all picked out, matching shoes, even a cute purse to complete the look. As I stood there scrutinizing myself in the mirror, I realized that what I really needed was some jewelry to finish off the look. So to my jewelry box I headed. Pawing through my tarnished relics (I HATE spending money on a newer version of something I already have, even if it is turning my neck green!) and broken bits that I have repaired over and over, I become exasperated. Do I honestly have nothing that will go with this outfit? And then I see a glint of gold at the bottom and pull out a tarnished (notice a pattern here?) yet serviceable necklace and low and behold both matching earrings (usually I can only find one of the earrings). So I flounce back into the bathroom to adorn myself with my finishing touches.

Standing once again in front of the mirror I admire my completed look, and realize that while the necklace and earrings are "serviceable" they just are not quite right. This is a snertzy event, I need to look good, not like a kid playing dress up with mommy's costume jewelry, not to mention that the outfit far out classed the jewelry and it was a bit obvious, not matter how far away you were standing from me.

Suddenly the light bulb goes off over my head. I have REAL gold jewelry that I can wear, in fact I have the perfect thing. A delicate gold chain with an equally delicate and beautiful drop pendant made out of one large translucent opal surrounded by several smaller translucent opals (kind of like a flower). I even have these gorgeous teardrop dangle earrings, gold and again translucent opals. If you have never seen a translucent opal, you have not seen true beauty. It is like a perfectly preserved drop of the most vibrant crystal clear ocean water - when you look at it you see a rainbow of fiery colors reflecting back in a sea of turquoise green, but you can see straight through it. Beautiful. Breath-taking. I can't believe I forgot I had that!

Back in front of the mirror (ok so by now you've figured out that I spend a lot time in front of the mirror, we can get into that later) and WOW! I look as good as I can possibly look - at least outfit/jewelry coordination wise. And this is when it hits me, the lesson.

Here I have this beautiful, real jewelry and I almost was content to leave it in it's hiding place and wear tarnished fake jewelry. In fact there have been many times when I have been content to wear the cheap, broken, fake jewelry instead of the expensive, beautiful, and real jewelry. And I realized that this situation is very applicable to my spiritual life.

I am constantly content to fill my spiritual life with the sustenance that the world has to offer: the fake, cheap, broken, tarnished, turning my neck green things of this world. I rarely remember that I have the "real" thing, an awesome, all-powerful, loving God waiting to offer me true sustenance, the bread of life and living water that will leave me thirsty no more. How pitiful am I?

Being content to fill your time and your mind with all of the things of this world, when you have the creator of the world waiting for you to seek Him, to deepen your relationship with Him, to draw near to Him, waiting to fill your spirit and mind with what it most desires, what it was created to desire, is just like wearing cheap tarnished costume jewelry with a beautiful ball gown when you have the most expensive dazzling real jewelry sitting in it's hiding place at home.

So does this prove that God likes jewelry? No, but He can use jewelry to remind me (and you) that He is not a God to sit in a hiding spot, while we parade around in trash. When you have the real thing, use it.

God's Ministry

Wow, what an amazing night I have just had. (eyebrows wiggling - no not that kind of a night, honestly, who starts off a blog titled "God's Ministry" with THAT?!)

I have just returned from a prayer vigil, not just any prayer vigil mind you, but one that I helped organize. You see Focus on the Family, FamilyLife and ShowHope have all partnered together to launch an annual National Foster Care Prayer Vigil. As a lay leader for a Foster Care focused ministry, of course this was something I would endeavor to involve my ministry and church in...oops I did it again (no, not the Britney Spears song) I slipped up, I called it "my ministry." What's wrong with that you might ask? You are leading it, you are investing your time, energy efforts and sacrificing time with your family, time cleaning your kitchen, time vacuuming your floors and time cooking delicious gormet meals for your husband for this ministry, why not call it yours?

Let me tell you why - because in all actuality it isn't "my" ministry, it is (as you may have guessed from the title of this blog) God's ministry. It is not through any credit of mine - or fault for that matter - that this ministry began. God did not even birth this ministry in my small, fragile, unfortunately wicked little brain. Someone else started it, I just stepped in. As is the case with most people in this world, I selfishly assumed when I began working in this ministry that it was "mine" - I had all of these fabulous ideas to help foster children and their families. I would inspire in our church a movement that would sweep through the city like wildfire - Charlotte would have a great awakening and it would spread from state to state, until there were literally no children left in the foster care system nationwide. In my head I even saw myself speaking fabulous words of inspiration and conviction, moving people to tears over the plight of these children, mobilizing people to do something, step outside of their safe little boxes and into God's amazing plan for their lives, loving these children.

Well, last night, it was made abundantly clear that I am not the speaker I envisioned myself to be. You see I briefly spoke at the beginning of the prayer vigil, letting people know what the agenda was and then giving them a few things to consider as they prayed for these children. Halfway through my "schpeal" a lady in the second row (mind you I was standing at the first row while I was speaking) asked if I could speak up, she couldn't hear me. God obviously did not design me to be the great orator I am in my head :p

In fact in the almost two years I have been involved in this ministry, none of my "brilliant" ideas have been brought to fruition. The only ideas that have worked are the ones that I have huffingly turned over to God, with the caveat that, "I can't do anything with it, if you want this to work God, then you do it!" I know now that God has been patiently (most likely with a little eye rolling too) waiting for me to say those words. My attitude of course could use some serious adjustment, but He takes His ministry back from me anyway and proceeds to work His will in it.

What does all of this have to do with the prayer vigil I mentioned in the begining? Well this is the first idea that I have wholeheartedly allowed God to "do with it what He will" for this ministry and it was a phenomenal and humbling experience for me. It is so very hard to not try to take control of things and accomplish them with your sheer will alone. Daily I found myself turning this prayer vigil back over to God.

The most humbling experience was when I realized that one of our head pastors was going to attend the prayer vigil, despite some schedule conflicts he had with it. I became increasingly anxious about who would show up. The overall reaction I was getting was, "Well that's a great idea, but I can just stay at home and pray..." (What?! Don't you people know that in all likelyhood you might spend a whole 5 minutes praying for this before the kids start fighting with each other or your spouse decides that you need to discuss the carpool schedule for the next week - NOW- or the phone starts ringing or you realize you forgot to update your blog and it'll only take a minute, etc...?) If everyone has this attitude then no one will show up for the prayer vigil and how will that look to the pastor, what will he think about me as a leader for this ministry, we'll never get approval to move forward with any of our ministry goals... And then in the middle of MY stress over MY ministry and how I will look, God very quietly, yet very insistently reminded me, that it is not about ME.

What was the purpose of this prayer vigil? To look good or to be the intercessors for these children and petition God on their behalf. There wasn't the slow splurting (yes it is a word, I just made it up) sound of a balloon deflating as I realized this, there was an audible POP as my balloon burst into a million pieces. God then graciously picked up my balloon, patched it and blew His lifegiving breath into it. It wasn't the big shiny bright attention getting balloon, I had started out with, but it was enough, it was the balloon God wanted me to have (I know, I know, it's cheesy, but it actually applies, so there :p). I realized then that if it were only myself and the pastor at this prayer vigil, God would still use our prayers. And it wouldn't matter what the pastor thought, if God wanted this ministry - HIS ministry - to accomplish its goals, then He would provide the means and the way and the motivation, not me, not any silly speech I might envision myself giving or any effort I might put forth.

I had wanted this prayer vigil to be a glorious display of people coming together for these kids, God just wanted it to be an honest display of people humbling themselves before Him, reaching out to Him to deepen their relationship with Him and to put themselves and their worries aside, to be selfless for one hour as they put the needs of these children in front of their own need for comfort and routine.

We had 20 people attend the prayer vigil, including myself and the pastor. The exact number that God wanted for His ministry. I don't know what the pastor thought, (remember, he had a scheduling conflict and he had to leave immediately after) but I do know that I am not worried about it. After all, it's not my ministry :)